Why women like me get a -Bad Rap
Why is it as a community -especially Christian community (((yikes)))- where women like me, who operate their business using a social media outlet are scrutinized and given the stank eye… yup, I just went there (and I hate that I have to!).
Let's jump right to it... Yesterday, I posted a reel that got a lot of traction and I noticed a trend in the comments. The women who had the most to say were other business owners, like myself, who primarily operate and sell through social media.
I know why this is, and I want to talk about it....
When I started Sarahfide Creations, I faced a lot of scrutiny over posting pictures and videos of myself. Not all the scrutiny was verbal. Some friends and family just stopped following me or just plain stopped interacting with anything I posted. What I'm going to say might shock you, but it NEVER occurred to me that I would have to step in front of the camera and become the face of my brand Sarahfide Creations. Truth be told, if someone told me I'd have to be in front of the camera all the time, I never would have started this biz, and that’s a fact! I’m glad I didn’t know because this has changed my life and my health. If you knew me before I started this biz, I was way more likely to post pics of my family.. I’ve never had a problem getting in front of people and publicly speaking (that’s what I did professionally for years) but having my picture taken was an entirely different thing.
BUT!!! The fact is, I'm in this for the long haul.
Sarahfide is part of me and when I say she’s a part of me, I mean she is like a fourth child, a part of my genetic makeup, born from the creative love I have in my heart. Because of Sarahfide and you, I'm willing to step out of my comfort zone, onto a limb, and do what must be done to thrive.
To thrive in business means you must make money. (I’ll add… I love creating beautiful jewelry but if I don’t sell the jewelry I create, I don’t make money, therefore, I can’t buy supplies and I can’t do what I love, which is create beautiful jewelry for beautiful women. (Seriously.. It’s a complete cycle.)
To thrive, I have to model my jewelry and talk about my jewelry. Advertising used to be a picture in a catalog, then it was a picture of jewelry and a link but that doesn't cut it anymore. We want to see people using it and living in it, which means opening my life to the world. Ninety-seven percent >>>(((97%!!!))) of my sales come from social media outlets and I'm sure it's the same for the business owners who commented on my reel yesterday. Friends, it is challenging to own a small business but it is so important that small businesses exist for our economy. (I think I'll do a separate blog about that. LOL). Not only is it difficult to be a small business owner but add Christian and Woman to the title, Yikes! I'm not only navigating the business side, but first and foremost I'm navigating my business with a Christlike mindset. It's hard enough to do business but throw in a spiritual compass...WOW!!! Words like modesty and testimony and statements like, you represent our church are used. It isn’t a small or easy task. The world's view on business is that “It’s not personal, it’s business and anything goes. ” But for me, I can’t take God out of the equation, He lives in me! This leaves me, as a business owner, swimming against the current of modern sales tactics. (In the fashion industry, “sex sells”… and I do not, will not operate under that mentality!) I’m sure it is the same for other women like me in business, which is why I think it struck a conversation point yesterday.
If I was a CEO, had a large office downtown, in the tallest building, it would be expected that I would dress for success, make public appearances and show up for social media events. I would be expected to advertise my product. People wouldn’t say, “She just wants attention” “She is trying to attract men” “She is so vain”. (or maybe they would???) But the reality is, why is it as a community -especially Christian community (((yikes)))- where women like me, who operate their business using a social media outlet are scrutinized and given the stank eye… yup, I just went there (and I hate that I have to!).
We have to start having this conversation with our friends. We have to be the woman who says, “Woooooe… I think you're reading that business owner ALL WRONG!” Lets change the conversation. Not only start changing the conversation but lets start interacting, hearting, and sharing content created by CHRISTIAN WOMEN IN BUSINESS!! I need you to like my content, because people with a -sex sells mentality- aren’t going to! I need you to comment. I need you to interact with me. You (and creating jewelry) is why I’m out on this limb. This limb has the best, most beautiful exhilarating view, and I’m here for it!!! BUT, It is going to take an entire community -every-single-one-of-you- to make this small business and other Christian women small owned businesses thrive.
No More Secrets
I’m not keeping secrets any more. Women won't buy from you if they know…
I’m not keeping secrets any more.
Several times, I’ve tried to talk about my real life… but I have trouble finding the words over the voices in my head. The voices shout things like….Don’t embarrass your family. Don’t tell too much. Don’t be negative. Put a positive spin on it so people won't feel bad for you. Be honoring to God. People wont buy from you if they know you're sick. The list is much longer… but, you get my point.
After several attempts to share my real life, but being unable to find a starting point, I’ve decided to come at this from a different viewpoint. In the past, I’ve tried to start at the beginning… but seeing how that is muddled and blurry, it’s almost impossible for me to start there.
So, I start from my current perspective.
A bed.
A Cat
Beads
Paint
And a window.
I’ve been in bed for two days. The short version… Four years ago a doctor accidentally removed part of my urinary tract, my left ureter, instead of removing my ovary. The consequences? Too lengthy to go into today. What I can tell you is that I have issues and it results in seasons where I suffer from cysts that form or infections related to my urinary tract. I hurt. Pain is my constant companion. Because of the pain, I fight feelings of anger that this medical mistake happened. I fight the urge to loathe and wallow in self pity. I fight voices that tell me God is punishing me. I fight demons that tell me death would be such sweet relief.
Before you judge me too harshly, remember, I’m baring my soul here. Be kind to me. Please.
There is an upside, Sarahfide.
Most of the time, I can still paint beads and run a business from bed. In fact, many of you may be dropping your jaws right now, because you didn’t know. Which, in many ways, is how I want it to be. My illness shouldn’t have anything to do with my business… but it does. Sarahfide was born from the bedside of a sick woman. The sick woman being me. In many ways, the woman you see today is because of Sarahfide ~ my jewelry biz. Sarahfide was born because of this medical injury. I started hand making earrings to get me through the day. I am the woman I am today, because of the healing Sarahfide has brought me. One can not exist without the other.
The good news is, I always get better. After bed rest and over the counter IBUProfen, the swelling goes down, the pain dims and I feel normal (my normal) again.
You might wonder how this affects business… it doesn’t. I have plenty of inventory, so when someone purchases something, I can pull it out of the drawer and ship it. Of course, it does mean that my hubby, John, has to pull out my adorable Sarahfide packaging and tie a pretty little bow; seeing how he was a warehouse manager for almost 15 years, he can handle it. Hopefully I’ve proven, I’m in this… All in. No matter if I’m sick or not.
Opening doors like this always lead to questions…and I want to be an open book. So here’s a little bit more, which might give you some insight into my life and more specifically, my health.
I’ve been as far as the top urologist at Mayo Clinic, there is no fix. I have to learn to live with kidney issues, urinary related infections and my current situation, cysts. This is and how it is. At some point, hopefully a long way off, the pain or a fever will force me to go to the hospital. I’ll be probed and prodded, like I’ve already been 100 times, seriously, I have some crazy stories. Surgery will be discussed and I’ll be encouraged to take medication that will help dull the pain or shrink the cyst or fight off infection, but medication comes at a cost. I know, because I’ve taken them and I’ve taken myself off of them. In all of the cases the medication didn’t seem to work and the side effects were sever. The bottom line, my body will never recover from the internal damage done. I just have to learn to live life, the best I can, and make the most with what I’ve been given. Which by the way…. is a lot. God has given me an amazing supportive husband. So supportive that he purchased my business license and did all the leg work to get me what I needed. God has given me the most amazing daughters who are a breath of fresh air and a HUGE reason I grin and bare it and don’t give into self loathing or drown myself in pain medications. I have parents and siblings that would drop anything and everything to help me, if I needed it. AND!!! I have you. Amazing, supportive, positive women who love me and my creations. Who not only buy my jewelry but wear it proudly. Talk about blessed. God has given me so much. He has been faithful, when I am not.
When I think about God, and His goodness, it’s the number one reason I want to share my real life. The girl you see in the top picture, the beautiful diva decked out in the most amazing jewelry, she’s me.. and the girl in the bed… well, she’s me too. Both pictures are me. Welcome to my real life. No more secrets.
WHY CharliRose&Co?
Lauryn openly talked about her relationship with her body. In many ways, hearing her struggles made me feel sane. I looked at Lauryn and saw a beautiful woman and hoped that even though I was struggling with my body, maybe I was beautiful too.
Meet Lauryn. She is CHARLI ROSE & CO.
When Lauryn was still living in Florida, she and I met because we worked in the same building, although it was for a very short time. At the time I was hired, Lauryn was getting ready to move to North Carolina. We were like two passing ships.
Lauryn moved, had a second baby and started CHARLI ROSE & CO. I was getting used to a new job and raising my three girls..
Then.
Everything came to a screeching halt for me. I was in a medical accident. While on vacation, in South Carolina, I got sick and ended up in the hospital. During an emergency surgery, my ureter was removed instead of my ovary.
Except for my husband at my side, I was alone. I was in a strange state- city- hospital and I knew no one. I started connecting with friends and family through Facebook. It was the quickest and easiest way to give updates about my health. From my hospital bed, I tuned into the CHARLI ROSE lives on Facebook and looked forward to reading their posts. Seeing Lauryn smiling and telling me, “Stay Beautiful” helped brighten my day. I needed all the goodness that CHARLIE ROSE brought, because my reality was, scars on my body were quickly adding up. I was feeling lost, hopeless… ugly. BUT!!!! Lauryn told me I was beautiful. Beauty comes in all shapes, sizes, and colors. Even though she was talking to everyone watching, in those moments, I felt like she was talking to me. A Sister in Christ speaking to my heart, reminding me that I am wonderfully and fearfully made.
Lauryn openly talked about her relationship with her body. In many ways, hearing her struggles made me feel sane. I looked at Lauryn and saw a beautiful woman and hoped that even though I was struggling with my body, maybe I was beautiful too.
Clearly there is more to the story but the condensed version… The medical injury took its toll on me. I diminished. I was very sick emotionally, physically, mentally.
I fought death. I fought to live and not let this tragedy destroy me. BTW, I still fight. Illness is and will always be a burden I carry.
For fun, I started creating jewelry.
Then, I started selling jewelry.
Then, -IT- happened.
Lauryn from CHARLI ROSE contacted me and asked me to create for her on-line/ in-store Boutique. These are some ChariRose&Co photos!! Love it all!!!
Now, Sarahfide can be found not only at SARAHFIDE but it can also be found at CharliRose&Co. I can’t begin to tell you the impact Lauryn and CR has had on me, my family, my business, my LIFE!
That. is. the. why. That is why, CHARLI ROSE & CO!!!
Some other reasons…. I LOVE the clothes!! I LOVE the beauty and grace they exude and I love seeing how they style everything. I LOVE supporting a small business. When I purchase from CR, I know my money is supporting a family, business, and community, right here in the USA. I LOVE Lauryn. I love her heart. I love her message. I’ve held her hand and cried, sat on her couch, and talked with her little’s. She is exactly what you see. A HARD working mamma, who loves Jesus, family, and county. A woman trying to help other women, like me and like you, find apparel that will encourage them to love the skin they are in.
BTW, it works. I feel absolutely beautiful, when I wear my Charli Rose and of course, my Sarahfide!!! Can’t you tell!!!!
We need women like Lauryn and we need businesses like CHARLI ROSE & CO!!! Let’s show her some love and support!!! Click this link right now and use the CODE I put below!!!
Happy Shopping and…. Stay Beautiful!
USE CODE:
SARAH15
for 15% OFF
your purchase at
CHARLI ROSE & CO
Wear My Heart
As I looked at her, she looked at me. I didn’t know her. As her eyes went down to her raising wrists, I realized she was showing me her Sarahfide Bracelets. I’d like to say I responded like Grace Kelly….
You wear my heart.
There are all kinds of creators and designers; amazing people who re-purpose and craft. With imagination and a little gumption, amazing things can be made.
What I do goes beyond that. Creating, for me, starts in my heart and pours out in the form of hand painted and hand stained wood bead jewelry. It is birthed from within me.
I send out pieces of my heart everyday in hopes that the love I pour into each small bead will shine in a big way, embellishing and bringing JOY to the woman who holds and wears it.
When I meet beauties wearing my jewelry, it is like reconnecting with a dear friend from the past. Every creation, every single one holds a special place, in my heart.
A few weeks ago, I met a beautiful stranger wearing Sarahfide, it meant more than I can articulate in words.
I was in a store about 30 minutes away from my home. John and I were purchasing some shoes for our middle child. I heard my name, “Sarah?”. I turned to see a beautiful and loving face with a most welcoming and sincere smile. As I looked at her, she looked at me. I didn’t know her. As her eyes went down to her raising wrists, I realized she was showing me her Sarahfide Bracelets. I’d like to say I responded like Grace Kelly but I think I was more like Kathrine Hepburn. I broke code, with her permission, and hugged her. We stood in the isle talking, about jewelry of course, and her beautiful southern name, Ella Jean. I am horrible with names, but I think it will be a name I remember forever.
We had to take pictures, of course. She was a kind and gracious woman. (The bracelets she was wearing had been custom ordered for her, by her daughter. So special.)
If you are thinking about purchasing jewelry to keep or to gift, I would be honored if you would consider purchasing and wearing Sarahfide. I can’t speak for major retails and hobble jewelers, but I can without a doubt tell you that your comments, likes, shares, purchases, and ultimately wearing Sarahfide literally makes my heart smile. Let me share a piece of my heart with you. Visit my Season’s Greetings Jewelry to see all of the NEW, Hand Stained, beaded jewelry I’ve added to the site, just for you. CLICK HERE
Glimpse Into My Private Collection
If there was ever ANY question if creating jewelry is my calling, talent, gift.... today brought finality and an end to those hidden questions that linger at the back of my mind.
Welcome to a rare glimpse inside my private jewelry collection. Fifty-six of my favorite brooches pictured here with many more packed away.
I started Sarahfide two years ago but my love for jewelry and vintage accessories started when I was a child.
Three years ago, when we moved from our large home to our current home, which is small, I packed away a lot of my jewelry and my vintage accessories. Some of the few vintage pieces that aren’t packed have been making a few appearances, you can see one of them in the picture. Notice the glove…
Today, I unpacked, sorted, and organized my jewelry collection.
-If there was ever ANY question if creating jewelry is my calling, talent, gift.... today brought finality and an end to those hidden questions that linger at the back of my mind.
~Isn’t it amazing how God curates our lives. As long as I can remember….
I. (have and will always)
Love.
Jewelry.
I love beautiful, well made, quality jewelry. I also love vintage costume jewelry. Gaudy, delicious, exquisite beads that, well... you don't see any more. I can not be more excited that I am breaking the mold in the jewelry industry. I'm not just assembling some jewelry kit and selling it or buying already made jewelry and reselling it, I'm creating jewelry from scratch. It starts with a raw wood bead and the value of that wood bead is purely based on the skill, creativity, and time I put into it.
I am excited to share more!!!
P.S. If you think I have a lot of brooches, just wait till I show you my private bangle bracelet collection. W.O.W!
But for now, I leave you with my Sarahfide Bangle Collection available HERE where all my Fall Jewelry can be seen…. also, notice the handkerchief in the top left corner…
…. beautiful.
XO
~s